It was dinner time and my home was quiet. Clint was upstairs meditating (snoring) and I was in my kitchen starting to prepare dinner.
The phone rang, when I said hello I was totally unprepared for who was calling.
Susan? this is Doctor (my colon surgeon), "How are you?" "You have been on my mind day and night"
Well doctor, I have been on my mind day and night! this decision is not an easy one and I have been back and forth with my options for a few weeks now.
He told me that the problem with me is that I did too well on my chemo, there is almost no Cancer left in my body, my liver surgeon says that he is not even sure that the smaller spots are Cancer. The larger of the spots is very light with only a small uptake of energy showing on the tests.
That is what makes my decision harder I told him. Why would you want to operate if you can't find anything is my question. How can I justify going through these major operations now?
He spoke with me for some time, letting me know the pros and cons of both side~waiting or having the operations now.
It was my longest and most productive conversation with him in almost a year.
I had a list of questions and concerns a mile long, they have been going through my mind endlessly these past few weeks. We discussed every possibility and it's consequences.
This conversation gave me hope and also a foundation allowing me to make a decision I can believe in.
My prayers were answered, my hopes stirred and my belief in doctors restored.
I have an appointment with the Liver surgeon on May 17th and at this time I will find out his concerns and suggestions and then I will go with my gut~so to speak!
This simple conversation, this phone call out of the blue, put my mind to rest, gave me hope and strength and belief in myself and the link to answers I need.
That phrase that runs through my mind to calm me~" Every little thing gonna be all right" is finally true!!!!!! In my heart I know that every little thing IS gonna be all right!!!!!
2 days ago