Monday, August 30, 2010

Changes in the air

As I sit here this early morning, window open to the quiet murmurings of the new day, I realize that life changes, slowly before our very eyes.

The golden mornings of summer are being replaced with the cooler air of a changing season. Autumn is on the way.

And so this past week brought changes to my diagnose as well. With the addition of a liver surgeon came more tests, two this week, a 3D CT scan and then a few days later a call came with the results. They saw more spots and wanted me to have an MRI as soon as possible. So at 8 PM on Wednesday evening Clint & I traveled downtown to Jeff for an MRI with attention to the liver, the order said.

Now anyone who has had a MRI knows that it is not a fun experience. I would much rather be traveling downtown for dinner and drinks but that was not to be. As I lay in that tube trying to breath and relax, I looked around at the clouds painted on the walls and the palm tree rising above my head. They try hard to make it as pleasant as possible and I guess I was suppose to imagine I was laying on a beach somewhere. Yea, a beach with a construction site! That banging sound the MRI machine makes as it takes your picture kind of makes it hard to believe you are on a beach!!!! 

The Doctor called late Friday afternoon.
He told me that the tests are very sensitive and that now they see liver involvement on both sides of my liver. He discussed this news with both my Colon surgeon and my Chemo oncologist and now they will put their heads together over this past weekend and call me on Monday (today) with a new and different course of action.

He explained that I will have to have more chemo ... this time aimed at the liver. He didn't have all of the answers just yet. A whole weekend to digest this new development! Oh goodie!

So I did what I knew would take my mind of this!

I gathered the four grand kids and went down the beach overnight. My daughter Tina, her husband Rick, Christopher~ 6 years old, Brandon and Finn both 4 years old and Gavin- 20 months, Clint and I ... off to North Wildwood. Where the sun and the sand and babies playing in the surf took my mind off of tests and diagnose. Where the tilt-a-world and the teacups on the boardwalk spin you senseless.  Where fudgy wudgies and sand castles rule!
We had a blast! as the kids called my name hundreds of times and we built sandcastles and buried our feet in the sand all thoughts of MRI's and Cancer melted away in the late summer sun.

I am not sure what is a head of me. Hopefully some answers will come by the end of today.
I am trying not too think too much. Just enjoy each day, each morning, each sunrise and the laughter of those beautiful kids!


  1. You know you are in good hands down there Susan! Here's hoping you'll get the plan of action soon! Prayers today and always....

  2. I just love it when they say close your eyes and relax... yep that is how I like to relax with a jack hammer in my ear...I hate those MRI's...My prayers are with you Susan..

  3. Susan This is Lynn Olson from Minnesota, I'm Carol Lapalamento"s friend. I have a very similar experience to yours. In 2000 I was told I had colon cancer and immediately had a colon resection followed by several months of chemo. While they operated on my colon they saw a spot on my liver but just took a biopsy which later revealed cancer. i went to Mayo clinic and had what was then a new procedure radio frequency ablation. It took for awhile. But on future CAT scans an area showed up and I later ( 3 years) had liver resection. I didn't need any more chemo and I Went to Italy on vacation 3 months later. I have remained in good health since and sometimes feel like this whole story happened to someone else, not me. However I do remain an advocate on getting a colonoscopy to anyone who will listen. On meeting you last fall i see what an upbeat and happy person you are. i was wishing I lived close because you are the kind of person I would love to have as a friend. Keep the faith and continue to surround yourself with those that love you, you have many of those. and I will remain a friend in prayer.. P.S. I have a new first grandson named Finn.

  4. Susan, you are an inspiration and a force of nature! Look up "grace under pressure" and we will find your picture (and if we're lucky, some of your wonderful writings as well).

    I am thinking of you every day with love and healing light. We are here for you and with you, every step of the way, cheering you on. I am so glad that you are in touch with what you need to de-stress and making sure you get that time away from it all, with the joy of your family and laughter around you. You go, girl!