Dehydration is a serious business.
When you are dehydrated you feel lethargic, dizzy, listless, your body works twice as hard and you really can't figure out what is wrong. A raging headache can appear in seconds, you list to one side when you get up from a chair to walk, you feel like you are under a cloud, dizzy, goofy even stupid!
Well after having the runs since my last infusion no amount of water, Gatorade, potassium pills would help. I have been feeling tired but that seemed the norm for me but this was something much more serious. I started to feel really sick right after one of my grandson's Christmas show on Thursday afternoon, I canceled my MRI that night ~who could be in a tube with a jack hammer at this point? I went right to bed. About 2 AM on Friday morning I woke up with a killer migraine and stayed in bed weepy and sick all day Friday and into Saturday. I missed my Grandson Brandon's Christmas show, on Friday morning, I couldn't babysit Finn and Gavin on Friday night although I promised a while ago.
When you feel sick like this along comes the tears, they are impossible to stop so along with feeling sick I was crying, Clint was crying, we were both a mess.
This is the time that the little voices come into my head WHY?? WHEN- if ever will I feel better? NOW?? at Christmas? WHY? No answers to those questions.
I decided I needed help. I called the infusion center and asked if they could hook me up so I could get some fluids. They were at my door in less than 2 hours to access my port and give me instructions on how to hook myself up when the fluids came. I did just that. On Sunday I gave myself 2 liters of fluids over the course of 6 hours and then another liter on Sunday morning. I spent all day Sunday glued to my bed. Hoping and praying that this would work and I would feel better.
My house is in disarray, each room looks like something blew up in there. Packages remain in their cardboard boxes, unopened from the time they were delivered weeks ago, my hamper was over flowing, my Christmas tree lay in my back yard waiting to be stood up and brought into the house. The trains set still wasn't up and my desk was overflowing. There was no energy to tackle any of this and it made me sad.
I am still not myself, a little better because I was able to go and get my MRI attention to the liver, downtown at JEFF yesterday. As I lay in that tube for an hour, ferocious banging in my head, sounds like a jack hammer is in the tube with you! I felt like I was in an episode of LOST IN SPACE , laying in the tube! beam me up Scottie! I was breathing and holding my breath as instructed, I thought to myself, OK this is it. FEEL BETTER NOW Susan!!!
Sometimes that works and sometimes not, but I have to say this morning I am feeling slightly better.
I can concentrate enough to write this blog. I will call the Liver Surgeon today and hope for a good news from the MRI. It would be a wonderful Christmas present~that's for sure!
My weepiness has subsided and I am getting control of myself ( I hope!) I will slowly tackle the disaster area that is my house and I am sure just that will make me feel better.
Christmas is days away, I can't believe how fast it got here. I will do what I can and what doesn't get done~ oh well!
I am so appreciative of all the cards and notes and gifts I am getting each and every day. I have to say that it brings tears to my eyes every single time to realize that I am surrounded by such support and love. and I thank you! I really can not do this without each and everyone of you! Your words of encouragement make me realize that I am not alone and that I am strong and that this will pass and I will be back to ME!
Take time for YOU this Christmas season, I know you are all running around taking care of everyone else but YOU are important too! take a breather, take a break from all the rushing, sit quietly, breath deeply, look around you. This season is really about the people not the things!
Hopefully I will get good news today or tomorrow, I will write again. Thanks for listening and being there for me. It make a world of difference not to be alone!
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